Once there was a blithe young maiden who lived in the Valley, setting hearts a flutter and minds awandering. Her parents – with a literary bent but clearly unkind as well - called her Yahoo. (They had read Gulliver’s Travels and had been impressed with the Country of the Houyhnhnms) She grew up to be a beautiful young woman, managing her affairs with skill and learning everything there was to know about the World until she became a Princess to all.
The King, in his vast palace on distant Red Mountain, knew of her but his fancy was of a different kind of girl. The ones he recruited to his harem were those with soft skills.
Meanwhile in another part of the Valley, a handsome Prince appeared. He had a brilliant intellect. Using his talent he created a new kingdom called Search. People flocked to him from far and wide in their millions. Prince Google, as he was called, saw that Search would lead him to new realms of unimaginable wealth.
Meanwhile, the King’s advisers said to him, “Your Majesty, you need Search. With Search you will become the master of the world”.
“I will have Princess Yahoo”, decided the King. “She is comely and she knows all there is to know about the world. I will offer her gold and she will join my harem”.
But when Yahoo heard of this she straightway rebuffed the King. Down the Valley Prince Google heard of her distress and sent messengers with tidings of reassurance and, some said, of improper suggestions.
The King, meanwhile, offered her more gold. Princess Yahoo turned him down again.
“Never”, she cried, “Will I ever fall into your clutches”.
“I’ll give you 37 dollars”, said the King
“Never, ever” she replied, “Make it forty and we can talk!”
“No, I will not be blackmailed,” said the King and stumped off back to his palace.
And so it would have stayed until Princess Yahoo’s Uncle Carl suddenly appeared on the scene. He had been tempted from the shadows by the size of the King’s dowry.
What will happen now, children?
Don’t forget Prince Baidu, the exotic Oriental potentate, whose fame is spreading as far as the Great Wall street.
And will Prince Yandex, riding in on his white IPO charger from the Russian steppes, have a role to play when he arrives in the Fall?